I guess it shows as weakness

Its funny and quite ironic, yet confusing all the same.

A girl of whom I have been madly in love with for the past 9 months, is having the dilemma that a boy she really likes is oblivious to the fact that she likes him and is right in front of him just waiting for him to reach out and acknowledge her.

Anyone with the capacity of thought can clearly see how this is ironic in my situation. Here I stand, still unable to put her from my mind. I have tried forcing myself to get over her. And for the longest time, I did.

When I sleep, I dream of her. When I lie around, bored out of my mind, I think of her. The best part of my week is Friday when I get to see her at the mall. During the school year, I purposely go the longer route to see her. Even if what she did was outragous and pissed me off to such an extent as for me not to talk to her, I will still purposely go and see her.

Yet she is oblivious.

This is a trying time for us all. The boy she likes happens to be a good friend of mine for the past 6, going on 7, years. He won't touch her because of me. (Even though he already kissed her.) He says thats as far as it will go. But now I face the repercussions that my favor in her eyes will diminish as if I told him to do that. So I'm put into a position of giving the go ahead for something that will surely tear me apart, or diminish in her eyes, but the results will be the same.

If there is a god... please help me.